Christina Graves, wife, mother of four, former Director of Catholic Marriage Education Services, Perth, December 12, 1952 – February 26, 2008
The following is an edited text of the eulogy delivered by Christina’s brother, Tony Meyrick.
Christina was born on the December 22, 1952 in Porthcawl, Wales, and came to Australia when she was two with her parents Jo and Terry and her two brothers Peter and Steve. Up until her mid teens she was known by all and sundry as Tina.
Most of her schooling was at St Mary’s, Leederville and, as many did in those days (especially girls), she left at 15 and joined the work force. She tried her hand at several things between ’67 and ’72 including Nursing Assistant, Shop Assistant, Clerk and Factory Hand.
It was during this period that she met her beloved husband Jeffery an; they were married on October 8, 1972.
I am unsure if the realisation that she could do anything was as a result of travelling from Perth to Townsville, including 282 miles of unsealed Nullabor, with her brand new husband in a mini packed to the gunnels.
So packed was the car that when they stopped off in Melbourne and visited her life long friend Chris McInerny who gave them some bowls as a wedding present the only place left to store them for the remainder of the trip from Melbourne to Townsville was on her lap. She and Jeff hadn’t seen each other for the 6 months preceding the wedding so on top of everything else this long haul trip in an overcrowded mini was also a getting to know you again experience – I think she figured if she could survive that trip she could do anything!
That trip was indeed a harrowing experience and I think it is fair to say that the trip to Townsville is the only time in Christina’s married life that she had any doubt that Jeffo wasn’t all she dreamed of – from then on it has truly been a contest of who loved who the most. They had a beautiful marriage which was admired by all who knew them.
In December 1972 they moved into a modest flat in Farmer Street, North Perth, before buying a house in Yokine in 1973.
Jared their firstborn arrived in January, 1976 and Christina put any career aspirations on hold while she became a full time mother.
In November 1976 the 3 person Graves family moved to Dianella where she was to become an active, progressive and influential member of the local and especially church and school communities for the next 29 years.
In 1977 her and Jeff’s next child, Daniel, was born and their first daughter Carly arrived in the Graves household in May, 1981 – approximately 1 month after Christina completed the City to Surf Fun Run in her eighth month of pregnancy, a feat which was mentioned in the national press.
The family was completed in 1984 with the birth of Megan. Christina’s passion for doing her absolute best at everything she did showed in the bringing up, with Jeff, of these four wonderful people
I am sure that her research and thirst to understand what was happening in her body during her productive years led her to a level of knowledge that enabled her to become a teacher at the Natural Family Planning clinic in Perth which she did from 1982 to 1997. Many of these years she also spent doing supervisory and co-ordination positions with NFP while still teaching.
Her career at NFP involved visiting high schools and lecturing on Natural Family Planning and matters of sexuality. One of the appraisals written by a student after one such visit mentioned “the lady should go on a public speaking course” – this led Christina to pursue a public speaking course so that she could again be as good as possible at what she did. She ended up as an excellent public speaker accumulating awards and honours along the way.
Christina re-ignited her inclination for long trips in cramped conditions when in 1986 the Graves family took 6 months off to take the first of two trips around Australia; trips to the outback, enjoying nature, camping and touring were a lifelong love.
Christina’s professional growth continued with her appointment in 1997 as the Director of Catholic Marriage Education Services where she spent nine years. While staying on top of administration she did a lot of client contact work and never lost sight of the fact that the organisation’s primary task was education.
She repeatedly reminded anyone who would listen that no matter how well the organisation ran administratively if it didn’t deliver in the classroom it had not met its core objective.
In 1999 she completed an Associate Degree of Arts at Edith Cowan University, becoming a member of ECU’s Golden Keys which is reserved for the top 15% of students.
She retired from CMES in July 2006 to walk the 1000 kms which is the Bibulmun Track from end to end. This took her through from September to December 2006 and was unfortunately the beginning of the end.
Although it can never be proved I am convinced that Christina was suffering from Leukaemia during this trip. Firstly, she had a badly cut leg that seemed to refuse to heal and secondly she noted to Jeff after her diagnosis that and again I quote “You seemed to be getting stronger and the walking was getting easier and I just seemed to be finding it harder.”
In February 2007 Christina was diagnosed with Leukaemia and she and Jeff spent a year battling the disease. Christina’s strength and acceptance was an inspiration to us all, and I quote her words exactly: “I am just going to give myself the best chance I can to get better”. Even though this eulogy is about Christina it would be remiss of me not to mention the absolutely devoted care Jeff gave to Christina during the last year of her wonderful life.
She made a real difference to the world and contributed in so many ways to the wider community – it is impossible to know how many better marriages are out there due to her stewardship and teaching at CMES and how many couples there are who can better manage their fertility due to her teaching at NFP.
On the day before she passed Christina was reasonably coherent and spent long periods awake in the morning but towards the afternoon started to lose consciousness on a regular basis. She had been unconscious for about an hour when the nurse arrived to check on her. While there she asked Christina, who was bruised from head to foot, with badly swollen legs and feet how she was feeling. The family was ready to respond that she hadn’t spoken for some time so was unlikely to answer. Before they had a chance to do so Christina as only she would opened her eyes, looked around and said “Fabulous”!!!
This was the last word she spoke.