By Caroline Smith
It was a casual conversation at a dinner party which led author Michelle Derrig to write the highly successful children’s book, Only For Me, which addresses the rights children have over their own bodies, and to privacy.
“It was at a dinner party in early 2014, that I heard about two separate cases in my immediate community, where young children in primary school had been sexually abused by children their own age,” she said.
“I was horrified to hear that in both cases, the parents had been supervising their children at the time.
“It made me realise, that no matter how diligent you are as a parent, the reality is that we need to empower our children to protect themselves. We need to teach them, educate them and develop the skills they need, in order to keep themselves safe.”
Ms Derrig asked herself, how might we engage children in a conversation about this? How do we talk to them about such confronting subjects, while maintaining their innocence? The result was Only For Me, a soft cover picture book featuring illustrations by former Disney artist Nicole MacKenzie, which was published in July 2016.
The book uses rhyme and bright detailed pictures to explain to children the purpose of different parts of their bodies (the eyes for seeing, the tummy for indicating hunger with rumbles, the hands for holding), culminating in the message that some body parts are private, and should not be shown to anyone – hence the title ‘only for me’.
Children are encouraged to respond with a confident ‘no!’ if someone asks to see these parts or to take a photo, and told that these parts on other people are also private and not to be shown to children.
The book is consistent in its need to give kids the confidence to respond to such situation, by finding a trusted adult, and knowing their own rights.
Ms Derrig said she was pleased with the response to her book, which has sold 2,000 copies since its release, including orders from across Australia, the UK and the US.
“I have also received requests for publishing in the UK, as well as several requests to create a culturally sensitive Aboriginal version as well as a sequel for those children who are known victims of sexual abuse,” she said.
“While I want the book to be accessible to all children, as a Catholic I also have a special place in my heart to empower and protect as many Catholic children as possible. From this perspective, I am very proud of getting a response from Pope Francis.”
Only For Me has also received local support within the Catholic Church, with endorsements from the Apostolic Nuncio of Australia, CEO of Truth, Justice & Healing Council Francis Sullivan and Andrea Musulin, Coordinator of the Safeguarding Project in the Perth Archdiocese.
Ms Derrig said the book’s message of self-respect and privacy had been further promoted by an educational initiative begun during Child Protection week in September 2016, in which schools, pre-schools and day care centres sent home information to parents regarding the book.
“The concept behind the initiative is to reach as many parents as possible. While Only For Me is a great resource for classroom use, I believe that it is essential for parents and carers to reinforce these messages at home,” Ms Derrig said.
“Only For Me provides parents with a beautiful resource to help initiate these challenging conversations with their children – providing an opportunity for clarification and sometimes even disclosure.
“So far I have had 12 Family Educators register their school to participate in the initiative, with St John Bosco at Engadine being the most successful, with over 100 copies sold in a two week period.”
Making the book – and its message – more accessible was also the reason behind Derrig’s decision to self-publish.
“Despite receiving initial interest from a publisher I decided to self-publish to ensure that the book would be sold at a price that would make it affordable for the majority of Australian families,” she said.
“My goal is to see it in as many homes and schools as possible and dream that one day it would be given to each kindergarten child as they begin their school journey. I welcome support from any organisation who can see the value of empowering and educating our children in this way and whom may be able to help facilitate this goal.”
Only For Me is available from the connected website, www.onlyforme.com.au at a price of $15.95 including delivery anywhere in Australia.All author royalties from the book will go to the organisations Bravehearts and Act For Kids, both of which work to prevent sexual abuse of children.
From page 26 from Issue 7: ‘Dominic Perissinotto: Growing in faith, with music’ of The Record Magazine