The mystery of marriage, a journey of a lifetime for the Meaghers

19 Mar 2020

By Amanda Murthy

By Amanda Murthy

The Meaghers celebrated their marriage with a Mass at the St Mary’s Cathedral on 29 June, in front of their loved ones. Photo: Thomas and Emily Meagher.

Thomas and Emily Meagher collectively believe that they would not have met, fell in love and dedicated their lives to one another if not for the calling they received from God.

The couple exchanged vows on Saturday, 29 June 2019 at St Mary’s Cathedral, and only this week, Emily gave birth to their first child.

“We wouldn’t be married if we didn’t believe God had called us to this vocation of marriage and all that implies,” Emily said.

“It was important to both of us throughout this discernment process to do a lot of reading, researching, listening to sermons on marriage, mediating and asking God for guidance.

“Without faith in Christ, who with His Church is the exemplar of marriage, Thomas and I would have never taken this step,” she reaffirmed.

The couple’s journey began three and a half years back, through their passion for the Church and a deep desire to learn more about person of Jesus, which Emily stated was something they only started ‘scratching the surface’ of when they first met.

Since then, Mr and Mrs Meagher agreed, that one of their biggest strengths and challenges as a couple is striving to let God in, to be the centre of their marriage.

“Sometimes we get distracted with lesser goods like work or study but nevertheless, we try our best to be vulnerable and honest with one another keeping one another accountable in our spiritual journey,” Thomas said.

“For me, it’s important I don’t be a lukewarm Christian but it’s a constant battle for us and we need one another to remind us of the God our marriage is supposed to witness to; a God revealed in the revolutionary life, death and resurrection of Jesus.

“We are reminded of that in Word, Sacrament, prayer and by a broader community of friends that understand the radical implications of the Gospel – Friends in Christ’s body that will challenge us when we become complacent,” he added.

Tom and Emily Meagher standing with Father Mark Baumgarten, at their wedding reception. Photo: Thomas and Emily Meagher.

Looking back, Thomas candidly recalled the moment he decided to propose to Emily.

“I’m a pretty pragmatic guy so I didn’t want to waste my time in a relationship that wasn’t going to eventually end in married life,” he stated.

“So after about a year of dating I tried to generate a conversation about marriage and we both decided we’d work pretty hard to spend the next two years preparing ourselves for marriage.

“We both understood marriage as a vocation; one which is ultimately about building up the body of Christ, the community and one another. We knew that marriage takes sacrifice and the kind of love that we see displayed in a crucified God,” he added.

Recognising the gift of marriage, both Thomas and Emily advised couples who are preparing for Holy Matrimony to always prioritise Mass and receiving Sacraments, pray fervently and be present in a tight-knit community that can keep you accountable to what your vocation entails.

“Don’t take it lightly because discipleship, whether you are married or single, is challenging and it will cost you a great deal but, if you do it with the right person, it will be an incredibly joyful and fulfilling life that you promise to live with one another,” Emily said.

“Also try and find a common cause that you both believe in. Apart from this being central to the gospel, studies show that the strongest marriages are those where the couple have a significant common purpose,” Thomas said.

“Finding something which is oriented towards anticipating God’s kingdom in the here and now and you probably have a recipe for success,” he added.

When asked about the most exciting aspect the duo look forward to as a married couple, without hesitation, both exclaimed, ‘the mystery of marriage.’

“We have little idea what God has planned for us, what surprises lie around the corner. We don’t have any illusions of grandeur,” Emily and Thomas cited.

“We just pray that our marriage would create what Dorothy Day called ‘little cells of joy and peace in a harried world.’

The Meagher’s celebrated their marriage with a Mass at the St Mary’s Cathedral on 29 June, in front of their loved ones. Photo: Thomas and Emily Meagher.

“We hope that we can play a small and extremely ordinary role in perhaps creating small pockets of hope in a world full of walls, ditches, barbed wire and border controls. But of course we need God’s grace and without him we are nothing.

“We need to be surrounded by a community of people that love us and will spur us on towards love and good deeds,” they concluded.